Sunday, August 14, 2011

Staying Sober in College

My husband found this article in the Wall Street Journal - thought I would share the link for it:


This is a great idea, I think. Seems like it would be a worthwhile effort, to get a center or a designated room(s) for recreation, meetings, etc, on every campus. Just a thought.

Update on the med situation: We were blessed this week to have two persons in our blogging community donate to us the exact medication my daughter needs. I was just blown away by the thoughtfulness and the generosity. She has enough to go about two months, and she has an appointment with the school doctor, to see if there is mental health help there which would include medication prescriptions. I have located a number of online resources for cutting the cost of the meds also. We have a plan and she is very grateful for what we received this week! Lou also gave me ideas for places to contact regarding medications that I would never have thought of! Thank you, one and all! I appreciate you all so much!

She's registering for at least two classes, possibly three, but I'm thinking she will probably stick with just two. She is on the verge of finishing her two year (Associate) degree. She is supposed to qualify for financial aid this semester, because she nailed her two courses last semester with an A and a B+. After this semester, all that is standing between her and the degree is some on-line math classes.

She's changed jobs successfully. She'll be working in a family-style restaurant in the mornings waitressing, and then she is an on-call employee for a catering company in south county (which she LOVES). She worked the US Open (surfing championship) last weekend for four straight days and can't wait for her next event.

Things have been a bit tense around the house.... while her med levels were low, she was a bit manic, and her dad has been, well, cranky. We have a lot going on with my business dying, and his part-time job becoming increasingly difficult (he feels they are trying to run out the old guys, and I can't make a judgment call because I'm not there every day). Finances are tight but sufficient.

What I can see, is his behavior around here which has me a bit concerned. He has always been outspoken and opinionated, but lately he has seemed more intent on having things go his way (even if it means breaking some promises), and at times, downright hurtful and mean.

Since my oldest daughter (DD1) has astutely targeted some of these behaviors and spoken to me out of concern for him, now new things are coming up on my radar screen. Is he well? Is he just turning into a cranky old fart? Or is this possibly indicative of something more?

Heaven knows I can be a cranky old broad. I am determined to try to stay calm and ironically, a lot of what I have learned in Alanon is coming to my aid. I don't have to participate in activities that might result in my being insulted. Every now and then he surprises me with behavior that is so nice/thoughtful that I almost can't believe it is the same person. Then it flips again.

I am trying to walk a fine line between not arguing with him over decisions being made regarding DD2, and trying to encourage her and applaud her accomplishments while insisting that both daughters respect the position he holds in their lives, if they are not able to respect him (his behavior) at some points. I have encouraged both of them to stay focused on their goals to get moved out - that will solve a huge amount of the problem, right there!

We still talk of moving to Tennessee. It all hinges on making sure that Tennessee's guaranteed-issue insurance is still available to me once we arrive. Fifty medical conditions qualify you for that guaranteed issue coverage which I will need for several years before reaching MediCare years. I have one of the fifty conditions.

Much will have to be accomplished around this house (painting, some renovations) to get it ready to sell in another 18-24 months; and I welcome the lightened work schedule which will permit me more time to do some of that preparation for selling, and of course, some sewing and quilting!

LeBoyfriend's brother is still hospitalized, complications include lack of motility in the bowel and an as yet unlocalized infection which has his white count soaring. Once they get his digestive system functioning properly and the infection handled, he will be transferred down here, and begin working on regaining his range of motion, etc.

LeBoyfriend took it upon himself to go to a former employer and apologise for the events of last year, and request that they consider rehiring him to drive for them. He prayed about it, he was honest and open with them, he offered to be drug tested at his expense any time. He was met with understanding, acceptance and a promise to seriously consider his reapplication.

Yesterday he found out that it is almost a certainty that he will get that job back. Driving for an oil refinery is an excellent paying job. One more step in rebuilding his life. I'm so proud of him!

I can't remember whose blog I saw this on, but I have printed it and stuck it on my monitor because it is Oh So True:

"I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to." Amen.

My prayers for all our children continue. :)


  1. Lots going on over there! I'm glad to hear that other bloggers were able to provide some meds for DD2. I used to have a pharmacy of meds saved up from things either kev or I tried but finally tossed them all. Maybe I should have saved them.

    Would your husband ever consider being evalutated to see if he might benefit from meds? I guess not, but it sounds like he may have some form of depression or something???

    So good to hear about Le Boy's job! That's wonderful. I hope his bro continues to heal and can get closer to home soon.

    Oh, and if you're a cranky old broad, you're the sweetest cranky old broad I know!!!

  2. I am so happy for your daughter. I can't imagine how proud you must be that she is trying to hard as well as her boyfriend.

    I hope that the Brother get's better soon.


  3. Good news..(mostly)..keep up the prayers. I for one know the power those friends of yours wield with their prayer.

  4. I can highly recommend Tennessee. I have been living here for 25 years and absolutely love it. I have lived elsewhere (VA, DC, AL, OK) and Tennessee aboslutely is the place to be. I live in upper NE Tennessee near the VA border. I hope everything will work out for you.

  5. It's good to hear DD2 and her boyfriend are making progress. It is upsetting to hear about the meds debacle, but hope something comes through with the leads you received. Pray for wisdom with your husband and potential move.
    God bless.