Friday, August 5, 2011

Looking for the Wisdom

At her most recent parole visit, my daughter was informed by the psych office that they will no longer be providing bupropion (generic for Wellbutrin). They will still cover her other medication, but he didn't recommend she take the other one alone. None of the medications they will still cover have proved effective in the past.

Their reason? The parole psychiatric board has decided that bupropion has been abused by some parolees in the past. Apparently by whatever means (crushed, cooked and injected? crushed and snorted? I dunno!) it gives a somewhat methamphetamine-ish feeling. Speed was not my daughter's drug of choice, though she has done it in the past. Heroin is her drug.

That's it. The end. No detox or tapering down. She's just going to be out of meds. And she's feeling the return of the bipolar symptoms. We're seeing them.

I'm trying to locate the best price and then I will approach both my personal physician and a neurologist I actually work for. Both are familiar with my daughter's situation. Perhaps one of them will continue to write her Rx.

In the meantime, she's trying to work hard, taper the second med and face the possibility that she may not be able to get her meds for a while. It took us a decade to get her willing to take them. She did it as a condition for coming home. I'm at a loss to understand why this has happened, but I'm sure there is a reason. Maybe she will be able to stabilize and maintain both her sobriety and living with her manic depressive symptoms. Time will tell.

Update on LeBoyfriend's Brother: Surgery went well, and after he is fitted with a back brace, they hope to transfer him home (five hour journey, I think) for recuperation.

And I found out that the swimming hole they had found was one the boys jumped as kids, when they were as young as 8 and 10. The family camped there every year, and this was a spot that LeBoyfriend had written to my daughter about when they were in prison. He described it as heaven on earth, with endless stars at night and beauty everywhere you looked. He told her if they did well when they got out, he would take her there.

He worked so hard to put this trip together, saved his money for camping equipment and food, bussed in his 16-year-old daughter and her boyfriend to go with them, and brought everyone together for a fun four day camping trip. He's so sad right now that his brother was hurt. He feels so responsible! He's already making plans to help with brother's financial responsibilities until he can work again.

He just never thought about getting older, bodies not being able to take what they used to take, etc. I still think it was more remote than it needed to be, but the fact that his family had been there for years makes me understand it a little better. It was just a fluke, I guess.

Prayers continue for all our children, and especially


  1. I sent you an email....please let me know if you got it? :o)

  2. Joy, I will send you an email also about some options with the meds.

  3. This pisses me off! That they are going to take her meds away because SOME people abuse it??? That's lame. I've been taking Welbutrin for years and have tried to stop taking it twice...both times I was having serious suicidal thoughts within a month. I don't want to scare you, but its what happened to me. I hope there are some resources out there to keep her on what she NEEDS!

    As for Le Boy, I feel bad for him. Its really sweet that he pulled that trip together, there was no way to know something tragic would happen. It could have been much worse. Glad to hear that Le Brother is stable. (and THANK you for the veggies!!!!!!)

  4. I sent you an email too. Please let me know if you got it.

  5. I came across your blog a while ago and read every so often. I was on wellbutrin for a while and going off of it was the worst withdrawls I have ever experienced. Look to NAMI for help paying for medications. Search the manufactors website, sometimes they will offer rebates. Good luck.