She called at 11:30 or 12 noon, screaming from the roadside. They had argued, and it got fairly violent with yelling and alledgedly, with slapping going on (both involved). She grabbed the wheel and yanked it at one point and the truck hit a post. He was able to stop. No one was hurt. She got out and ran, supposedly thinking he was angry enough to maybe hurt her. She called us as she was running and was basically screaming that she wanted to die, that she had killed the relationship.
She had been supposed to call the detox at 1 PM. We got to where she was and took her back to the scene of the accident in case police were called and she needed to make a statement. The truck tire was flat, bumper was half torn off on right front. His brother and he were leaving in his brother’s truck. We stopped beside each other long enough for DH to ask if they were going to report it, and did they need a statement. When he determined Boyfriend was emotional, not angry, he got out to speak to him and I got out too.
He begged us to get her some help and he stated he was going to have to take care of himself. He said he’d be fine, he just couldn’t be fine with her. He was shaking, unable to focus his eyes, teary and obviously "out of his mind on speed". He admitted that. He and his brother left and we got back in our car. My daughter had just stayed in the back seat crying. She has repeatedly said she wants to die. Someone more professional than I will have to determine if she is attention-seeking or sincere.
She called the detox, still crying. She was told to call back at 4 PM. She called Probation, who wanted to see her before she went in to detox, if there was a bed. Probation said for her to come in. She went. Loooooooong wait with her while we watched her officer toss another person’s car for drugs. She finally got in, and her officer asked me to accompany them. Ugh.
In the office, Probation grilled her until she finally gave up the fact that she’d been with Boyfriend. She admitted it only after being told that if she didn’t admit what she'd been up to, she’d be arrested instead of being released to go to detox. She was mouth-swabbed for the records, and photos were taken of her arms (cut to ribbons). Probation called the detox (it was 3 PM by then) and got her cleared to come right over. We dropped her there, with her bag of clothes, PJs, sweatshirt, toiletries. We can call after about 48 hours if we like and visit during certain hours.
I’m in no hurry to do that. I want her to focus on her. But that’s up to her.
After seven days, they will boot her out of Roque Center detox. She will then have to start calling to see if she can get a bed in an actual treatment center. Probation wants to see her immediately after she is released.
I think, but must confirm, that the Salvation Army would take her that day after a phone interview.
It is my feeling today (which obviously can change because I'm all over the board emotionally), that if she can't get into any of the placers she wants (Villa, Roque Center treatment unit, Cooper, Nancy Clark, etc), but she is TURNING DOWN a bed at Salvation Army, I will simply tell her she has to stay somewhere else to make the calls to get where she wishes to be. That attitude from her at that point would demonstrate a lack of necessary willingness. DH is already saying he doesn't like my viewpoint.
I got home and Boyfriend’s mom had called. I returned her call and she told me they could have been killed because of my daughter’s actions and told me in no uncertain terms that she felt the two of them should not be together for a long, long time, if ever. I heartily agreed, but carefully stated I hoped that our children understood that also. That obviously we could not keep them apart. She ended the conversation and that was that.
I’m going to have some dinner and get horizontal. Long day. She is safe and getting a six day binge out of her system. I have a seven day reprieve before this is in my face again. G'nite!